With today's divorce rate, people have come to believe that marriages are "for better or else" rather than sticking it through thick and thin. Now don't get me wrong, I totally understand why marriages fail, especially when children are in the picture. Both parties feel over worked and under appreciated, and life as you once knew it is turned upside down. But I am still old fashioned and don't think divorce is an option except for a very few circumstances. Lately, John and I both have been learning to deal with the stresses of life, family, and toddlerhood with a strong commitment to our marriage. Just like most couples, we have had our ups and downs as we each feel misunderstood.
Recently, we had been trying to work out new guidelines for every day living. Now, I don't want to give you the wrong idea. This was a very calm discussion, one that most couples need to retouch on every now and then. We both feel over worked, under appreciated, and neither of us has time to pursue desired activities. But right in the middle of our discussion we realized it was time to put the little tyke to bed. As usual, we all went to lay on the big bed until our little one became super drowsy or fell asleep.
Usually, we have one or two games we all play in the big bed. We sing songs, play clapping games, chase shadows, we even play counting games. Our little guy will usually give us a kiss if we ask. He will pucker up and say "Mmmmmmwah". On this day when we asked for a kiss, he gave us one and then felt that it was important for Mommy and Daddy to kiss, so he pushed our faces together while saying "Mmmmmmmwah". John and I both laughed, as our little one made us kiss again, and again, and again. This game went on for about 10 minutes. And the funny thing is, all of our hurt feelings and bitterness disappeared. We laughed, loved and remembered why we got married. I think if everyone had a marriage counselor for a son, there would be far fewer divorces. Our son made us put aside our differences and remember that we love each other, and nothing else matters. How profound! What a lesson to learn from a baby that isn't even 18 months yet!
Every night since we have been playing the marriage counselor game. And every night we have been reminded that we love each other very much and will work through anything together. I am so lucky to have such a wonderful family.
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